Read this thread before asking a question, it will answer most of your basic questions.

I almost forgot. THE ABSOLUTE MOST IMPORTANT THING ABOUT APPROACHING WOMEN IS BODY LANGUAGE. The best advice I can give you is just stay calm, slow your words down more than normal and give her time to answer your questions. Also dont fidgit with things, thats a big no-no.


lol well guys, I have actually recieved a few PM's from people (names will be hidden unless they want to be revieled) And I decided to start my own thread. If you have any questions on dating, love or attracting the opposite sex, feel free to PM or write a question in this thread and I will give you advice on what I have learned. And keep in mind, its ADVICE. Anywho you can find some older advice in this thread

This post has been edited by bloodrain: Aug 19, 2006 - 10:06 AM

So yeah.... theres this girl.... and she loves my car....more tahn me probly. How can i stop her from stealing it? lol..............It's true

ok this is something that has been really bothering me lateley and I dont know what to do.
Theres this girl that moved down over here not too long ago and when she moved down here I met her beacuse a friend introduced us. Right away we connected and I was one of the very few people she talked to over here and still am. We have since then been talking online and I see her every so often with my other friend. I really like her alot and I cant stop thinking about her. Theres only one BIG problem and thats that she has a bf already...

I totally respect that and all but its hard to just talk to her all normal like nothings there. What Im asking is, would it be wrong of me to just let her know how I feel??

I do know that she fights alot with her bf but I dont get into her buisness so I just ignore the topic.

You can tell her how you feel. It's ok. But just make sure and let her know that your friendship is open, not your heart. Your heart can wait till she is single but your friendship can last forever.

the link where you gave that advice is golden, should be a sticky for every guy to read. all too often i see guys making mistakes being too nice, too available, etc. from what you wrote in other thread i can tell that you know your stuff everybody asking for advice, listen to this guy.

So, could you give us examples of being too nice/avail? And examples of where we should stay, in terms of the 'nice/avail scale'? I'm one of them guys who just throws himself out there and I can't seem to fathom how to be in the middle of either "all out" and "not there at all".

so ive got this rash...o, misunderstood the thread...



sorry. : ) lol

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I wish I had that problem, all my ex's think i'm obessed w/ my car. And honestly I dont spend or go online nearly as much as I used to. And I really dont talk about my car like I used 2. I only really talk about cars to car guys now.

I think youre more of a psychologist...but if ur a psychiatrist can I get some meds?


PS - a girl wants a guy thats the right amount of available and not available because i know personally I would love a guy to be there to adore me but once I have it im over it and want the chase.

This post has been edited by BlackCelicaGT94: Aug 18, 2006 - 11:05 AM

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Ah the age old dilema. Its a simple answer, you dont tell her anything. Simple as that. What most guys dont realize is they give all the power to women. The very second you tell a girl you have feelings for her you lost all the power. The real problem is this, your deciding if your good enough for her, when in reality it should be is she good enough for you. Now think to yourself, if she has a boyfriend, and breaks up with him to be with you, what makes you think she wont do it again? If a girl EVER does that, dont ask questions, dont make excuses, just leave. History ALWAYS repeats itself. Now if you still want to be with her (and im assuming you do) all you have to do is be patient. (Refer to link at the top of the page) The first thing you have to do is NOT always be there when she wants, like I said, girls want what they cant have. And by waiting around hand and foot for her your doing exactly opposite of what you should be doing. If she is having problems with her boyfriend, dont try to interfere because more than likely it will not work out for her. Be patient, its also ok to start talking to other girls. If she has any feelings for you it will only fuel the fire. (Again, refer to my other page for DATING guidelines). If you can give me some more info on her I will be more than happy to give you more advice on what to do. But right now this statement is kinda vague because all I know is "you like her, she has a boyfriend" lol.

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Ha, thanks for the catch ;-)

Anywho shes totally right, its all about the chase. If you know how to keep the girls guessing, your as good as gold. And thats what im here for!

This post has been edited by bloodrain: Aug 18, 2006 - 11:19 AM

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Ah idiotstick, you need to read my link again, lol. Read the part where I have 1-12 (i think it was) and if you still have any questions feel free to ask. Basically you have to learn to enjoy your "single life" even if you have a girl or are interested in them. Im assuming you have guy friends or other girl friends,
its OK to say "oh sorry I already have plans for thursday, how about we do something sunday." Be focused on yourself, show her you DONT NEED HER to be happy. Because as soon as she sees you trying to 'cling on' it shows a sign of weakness and insecruity, and as we discussed before, thats bad.

So what happens when she becomes a "cling on" does a guy find that unattractive as well? much like a girl does?

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The same principle still stands. While there is no denying there are different personalities, im giving general advice, so take it with a grain of salt. But for the most part, guys do not want a clingy girlfriend because they feel they lose there 'freedom'

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Except some guys that drop off the face of the earth when they get a girlfriend and their friends are like "What ever happened to him?"

I agree with what Blood is saying but think that the rules dont transfer as well to guys because guys can make up their mind better. A woman is generally always looking for something better until she hits about 32...then the panic begins to set in.

if they drop off the earth so to speak, thats the cause of a clingy guy

bloodrain

i love my car more than my gf, is that normal!?

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then you obviously dont love your gf... simple enough :-p

bloodrain you so crzy I think this is really good.

The only problem i have is I spend so much on my car just to get it maintenance cause the previous owner did not care for it at all. I spend my whole paycheck just about. After getting all my maint. done i get a hit and run, broken into or one lil thing cause a whole castrophe. I feel like giving up on it. But i dont want to let it go. I'm in love with the car, I adore it so much and its so bad that its a turn off to the girls i talk to now. I was looking around for a mr2 or a rx7, but i just cant seem to let it go. I really need a reliable car right now cuz my job is a 45min drive and i car pool with a guy that listens to gothic death metal @ 6am in the morning. gd. i rather drive myself but i only got 4 gears to work with and i dont wana blow my motor up driving 5k rpm. So iono. What would YOU do? Maybe i should post a couple of pix of whats bad of it.

This post has been edited by My2Celi: Aug 18, 2006 - 12:43 PM

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Haha nat, first, im not tim lykis (whoever he is, lol) second, there is nothing wrong with approaching a woman in a crowd, its just VERY hard to get the number. You have to know what your doing, i've succsesfully done it 4 times, out of about 8 attempts (all different groups of course.) And about the getting laid part, if you base your relationship off sex, its not going to last. Period. If you looking for a good time, then follow that rule, if your trying to have a relationship, then dont even push for sex. And the less you push for it the better your chances are of getting it. Again, this throws girls in a loop, they always assume you want to get laid, if you can show them you dont, you've managed to retain the power. Good job ;-)

Ya know whats hot? when ur dating a guy and ur in the moment of messing around and he wont let it go further!

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and again, it proves my point. Girls want what they cant have. And the less you want it, the more you get it. lol

No its more of a wow he wants this to go somewhere rather than a place to keep his friend warm and happy

treat a girl like dirt and shell stick to you like mud.

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That seems so f'd up... but it is true in some cases... Girls that do that in my opinion are stupid for putting up with a guy who's treating them like dirt...

I myself would scram if I even had the sense I was being treated like dirt... Hence my last relationship, he suddenly changed from a nice guy to a big douschebag... I left him quick, even though we were together for a year.

2 Weeks later I got another boyfriend (my current one) and I guess you could say I've never been happier... I've been with him for nearly 8 months strong now and he's my best friend. He has never treated me badly, he's respectable, he listens, he's there for me, he can cheer me up... and I do the exact same thing for him.

Unfortunately though... our relationship is going to be going through a huge test... He's going off to the military in less than a month. I really dont know whats going to happen. Time might get the best of us, I really hope it doesnt tho... I really love him and he loves me...

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first, this statement is completly false. Girls DO NOT WANT TO BE TREATED LIKE DIRT. Now your probably gonna say "i see it all the time, he treats her like ****, but she wont leave." The thing is, the girls not attracted to be treated like ass, shes attracted to the fact he is mature (more or less) and he doesnt act clingy. While hes treating her like ass he is demostrating leadership and male dominance, which girls are attracted to. Girls DO NOT want to make decisions, that is the mans job.


and celicabuddy, your situation is gonna be difficult. As I see it, you have 2 choices.

Option A: Continue the relationship
If you choose to continue it and try to have a long distance relationship, keep in mind they RARELY ever work out. You also run into 2 majors problems.
1) Human nature - While it is possible to 'hold out' until he comes back, you must realize BOTH of you are fighting human nature. Its 100% natural to have 'cravings' for the opposite sex. We love attention from the opposite sex, and being gone for extended periods of time creates thoughts that arent so 'loyal' so to speak. This comes down to how much do you trust him, and how much he trusts you. Because let me tell you, it only takes 1 time for someone to cheat and it will permanatly put thoughts in your head.

2) The military - When people go to the military, they change. He WONT be the same person when he comes back. You can ask anyone who has been in the military, Im sure they will all agree with me. Or even look at your other friends who went into the military, they changed. While he will have alot of the same characteristics of he did before, there will be things that have change, and you will notice them. Now keep in mind I never said ANYTHING about changing for the worse or for the better


Option B: End it on a good note

This would honestly be my choice. Im sure you've heard the old saying "If you love it, set it free, if it comes back, its meant to be" or some variation of that saying. Its 100% true. This will give you time to miss each other, you will be free to date and experience other things. Maybe you find someone else, maybe you realize hes who you want to ultimatly be with. The time apart is a good thing. And like I said, you ended it on a good note, there were no bitter rivlaries. If he kiss's another girl or you kiss a guy, you guys werent together anyways. And when he comes back you can decide if you want to resume where you left off.



Anywho, ultimatly its your choice, as I said before take everything I said with a grain of salt. Use your judgement on what to do. All im here for is to provide some insight on how us humans work, and share past experiences.

This post has been edited by bloodrain: Aug 18, 2006 - 5:31 PM

I bet you he's been reading it all and writing down notes, but just wanted to add the usuall immature remark, such as that.

I can't think of anything else to ask right now, you've pretty much summed up the basics.

wow you are awesome, this is all very good advice.

I get what your sayin Bloodrain.... I dont ever really find myself cheating. I would end it before I'd ever stoop that low.

I've thought of both choices to be honest...

K my reason's for hanging in there and continuing...

His job he's got in the Army will give him A LOT of leave time... He's going to be a Linguist (sp?). Basically he'll get every federal holiday off and then some more... Which means he's gonna be around a lot, but then again he wont.

Then also... It wont really matter that he's gone, cuz even if he was still around I wouldnt really have the time to hnag around with him. Cuz I'm gonna go to school in the winter. I'm gonna be far too busy with that, like homework, projects, studying all that bs and then plus working. i wont really have time for a boyfriend With him leaving it's kinda a bonus... Cuz now where doing what we want to get our lives all figured out, and we cant really slow each other down... In my eyes I see it as a positive thing...

There's a few other reasons... but thats basically it...

Then I thought of just ending it... cuz well I'm still very young. I dont wanna like make a mistake by waiting around for someone, when later having it end... Cuz then whats the outcome of that? I waited around for someone who was never around, then when they were around it ended and i wasted my time for nothing, when I coulda been out and about with other people ya know... finding out what type of person i really want... Thats the main reaosn why I thought about ending it.

And then yes the military does change people... but not that much. I would know My best friend left for the army after I graduated. She calls me every now and then and its as if nothing really changed. She's got the same old sense of humor, and everything. I think the only thing that's changed about her is that now she's more responsible, WAY more mature, and well serious. But she's still herself... But that's just one person from the military. I dont know what could happen to my boyfriend... But from what Ive seen with my best friend, that would be an added bonus to my boyfriend lol

Im not too worried about the military changing him... Ive hung around a lot of military people, and I love them all, they are all just so awesome... I'm actually kinda excited to see what the military will do to my boyfriend...

For now I'm gonna hang in there and see what happens... When he leaves in the middle of September, he'll be back for Christmas... 3 months basically... We'll see what 3 months can do...

It definetly sucks tho...

This post has been edited by CelicaBuddy: Aug 18, 2006 - 9:19 PM