today i go to turn my car on after it sat in the driveway for 2 weeks and it wont start. the lights dont work, i when i turned the key there was no sound at all. i tried flicking on my hazards and they wont work. i have an auto and when i turn the key to the on position, i cant even shift out of Park. anybody know whats going on? had this problem before?

Your battery is dead. You need a jumpstart or a new battery.

you got a dead battery my friend, to put your car in gear, stick your key in hole near shifter then u can go in neuteral to move your car if need be. untill then just go get a new one.